Stow starlet Conar Campbell was unable to attend the fund raising race night held in the Ladhope recently as he had no clothes to put on. 7ft 14 inch Campbell texted club Secretary Tucker McCall to inform him he could not attend as the text read “I honestly have nothing home with me to wear so can’t!” McCall who had to be treated for shock at Campbell’s response could not believe his phone.

He said “I always thought the fashion for the youngsters today was the scruffier the better I’m sure the big dud could have thrown some jeans on and made the effort, I could just imagine him stuck in his house with nothing but a newspaper to wear. I think the club will have to have a fundraiser to get Conar a tracksuit”.

Stow AFC Secretary Tucker McCall has hit back at criticism of Stow Park as a “cow field” and farm land. The criticism appeared on football forum website “Pie & Bovril” and was posted by Trevor or Trev as he is known to his pal.

“I’ve “herd” it all before” said McCall, “Stow is home to many, many forms of wildlife. cows and sheep can often be seen in the fields around the village gathering grass for their nests whilst hedgehogs and cats are frequent visitors. Amazingly in 1957 a Blue Whale ran aground next to the football pitch after it became disorientated in the North Atlantic and swam up the burn in the village before becoming stranded. Villagers tried for three days to try and push it back to sea but gave up and made it into margarine instead. During the 1960s Stow made national headlines when it was terrorised by the “Beast of Stow” which roamed the moors surrounding the village. Reports at the time describe “the Beast” as being roughly the same size and shape as a black Labrador. A farmer once managed to corner “the Beast” but it managed to escape. He said before his death in 2002: “ I’ll never forget the noise it made when I cornered it. It’s a noise I’d never heard before and have never heard since. Sort of a barking noise.” Wasps however have been banned from Stow since 1989 after one stung the Community Council leader on the inside of his mouth after it had landed on a can of Vimto he had been drinking. Bees are only allowed to enter the village under certain conditions.”

McCall commented “At least when you look around the village and we are surrounded by natural hills not coal bings and when we get up in the morning we don’t have to worry that our pitch has disappeared down an unused mine shaft overnight”.

StowPark or the “Village Green” as it was dubbed by former Gala Rovers boss Scott “Mabawsza” Ritchie is situated in the centre of the BORDERS village. It has been played on just twice in the last two months and is one of the few BORDERS pitches which still has it’s goalposts standing.

McCall added “we divert thousands of gallons of water onto the park every winter just to ensure it doesn’t dry out and to give local canoeists somewhere to paddle. Then in the spring we sprinkle it with lager so the grass comes up half cut. In preparation for the Beveridge Cup final we have even had the players crawling across the park clipping it with scissors and we have asked a local artist to paint the lines so it meets the exacting requirements of Pencaitland Football Club.

When BORDERS Amateur FA contacted the club about the possibility of hosting the final we were reluctant as we have a crop of potatoes going in but we decided to chip in and help despite the fact we really need the field back as it has been used as football pitch for years ever since the old pitch over the roman bridge on the BORDERS side of the village was closed”.  The BAFA did mention that the two clubs involved could not agree on a venue. The Peebles option was rejected by Pencaitland as it was just 6 miles from Innerleithen, Leithen Rovers rejected the Arniston option as it was just 11 miles from Prestonpans and just 9 miles from Pencaitland meanwhile the whole of the BORDERS rejected it because of one wee problem - it is not in the BORDERS!

Pencaitland’s reluctance to use theStowParkcan be fully understood as their last visit to the Village Green saw them dumped out of the South Cup by the home club.

In a re-vamp of the management and coaching set up at the club, former Stow player Fraser "Bubba" Riddell has accepted the position of Assistant Manager at the club. Fraser had to give up playing following a bad leg break whilst playing for the club two seasons ago. Manager Andy Thompson had been on the lookout for an assistant and had approached Fraser to help out at the club.

The manager also intends to add a coach and several players to his squad in the very near future. There will also be a chance for some of the current squad to take coaching courses, or add to the badges they already have, with a view to introducing coaching sessions for the local youngsters at Stow.

The playing of the Stow Carlsberg Soccer Sevens were again thrown into doubt following yet another flood at Stow over the weekend. The sevens which have been cancelled twice already this season are scheduled for this coming Sunday the 14th September.

Luckily the pitch seems to be the only problem, the changing rooms avoided damage by a matter of inches.